When I read these words there is one thing that comes to my mind – Commitment. That regardless whether things are great or if things are just terrible I am going to be committed to the vows I made to my God and my wife. You know the “for worst” part I get…I mean for the most part there is a flight that happens when things go bad. People begin to abandon ship and just let that boat sink. A spouse gets gravely sick, loses a steady job, abuse, or death in the family can be classified in this “for worst”. – (i will talk about this in my next post)
When I think about “for better” I think why would someone want to leave during the good times of marriage. Promotion, raises, birth of a child, are all blessings…but they are also reasons why people choose to abandon their marriage.
“Sometimes success in life destroys a marriage. There are women who have worked to get their husband through medical school, only to be dumped for another woman after her husband became established in his career. There are men who encouraged their wives to pursue education or career, and were left when their wives began to gain newfound confidence.
The key to avoiding this pitfall is seeing yourself and your spouse as God sees you. God has taught us not to put ourselves or anyone else in classes or leagues. He has taught us not to think of ourselves as better than anyone else. He has taught us that we are all gifted and we are all loved. If you see yourself as gifted and loved by God now, encountering success later won‘t make your head inflate. You will recognize that your gifts came from God and the doors you walked through were opened by Him.
When Paul writes about using our gifts to serve others, he first warns us not to have an inflated view of ourselves.
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. (Romans 12:3)
Later in the same chapter he shows us that we need to ignore the barriers that often separate people, and treat everyone with respect.”
“In Malachi the Lord tells us that He hates divorce. He says,
Another thing you do: You flood the LORD’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because He no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are His. And why one? Because He was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. “I hate divorce,” says the LORD God of Israel, “and I hate a man’s covering himself with violence as well as with his garment,” says the LORD Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith. (Malachi 2:13-16)
God is speaking to us married folks when He says twice, ―guard yourself in your spirit.‖ There are many wrong attitudes to guard ourselves against, and thinking we have become too good for our spouse is one of them.
In verse 14 He says, ―she is your partner
The Hebrew word for partner ―chabereth‖ is from a root word ―chabar‖, which means to unite. If we are partners, then whatever success, failure, hardship, and joy we face in life belongs to both of us. If things come along that are ―better‖ than we were expecting, we should enjoy them together.”
Talk About It – Since you married, what has been better than you expected? What effect did it have on your marriage?
